There is no doubt becoming a mother is game changer. I often think about the time I wasn’t yet a mother and wondered what I did with all my ‘free time’ and what purpose my life had.
In the two-and-a-half-years that I have been a mom, I have learnt so much about myself! I have grown, bettered myself, mastered many skills and have made many, many sacrifices.
I decided to pen down six lessons I have learnt being a mother:
1. My needs, wants and desires will never be first again…
The moment Maddie was pulled from my body and I saw her little body crying her first breath of air, my whole entire life’s purpose became being her mom, loving, protecting her and raising her as best as I possibly could. I think my realisation that my ‘being’ would always be put second to her little life the moment I fell pregnant with her. It is something you cannot explain and only a mother would know… She’s an extension of me and giving her my all, even when it hurts or isn’t ‘convenient’ for me, is something I will always do!
2. My body will not belong solely to me again in a very long time…
And in not the way you would think. Not in the fact that my body shape or skin would change but in the fact that I have not had my body to myself for over three years… From pregnancy to breastfeeding Maddie into her toddlerhood (I am planning on making it to three-years before I wean her), I have not been able to do things like take medication when I have a headache or have a bottle of wine :). The things I would usually put inside my body could and would harm her. I never imagined frighting off sicknesses medication free… and I suffer with migraines very often!
3. I am far from perfect…
I was definitely one of those moms who hated all the ‘advice’ I was offered when I was pregnant and the comments like “when baby is here you won’t do this.. and you won’t have time for that…” It was highly annoying and I promised myself that I wouldn’t be so negative about the realities of being a mom and that I would be so much better than X who was battling through sleepless nights for example. I realised pretty quickly that I am no angel mom. I definitely didn’t get the manual on how to parent perfectly. I made and still do make many mistakes. I promised I wouldn’t let my child eat sweeties… well, she does… The good news is none of us are perfect and that is the beauty of motherhood! We all mess up, can relate to each others mistakes, can help each other through our problems and we all know our kids will one day be 21, be potty trained, know how to talk properly and eat veggies. There’s no such thing as a perfect parent…. only a real one.
4. I am stronger than I thought
The moment I saw my child I instantly loved and respected my body a hundred times over! Two-and-a-half-years later and I am still in awe of what my body grew inside of it. My perfect ten toed, ten fingered daughter. Apart from growing Maddie in my belly, going through childbirth and breastfeeding, the amount of patience, endurance and strength I have found in my journey of figuring out motherhood has amazed me beyond!
5. To trust my way
I realised pretty quickly that my child (like every other child) is completely unique. Learning how to be her mom and figuring out what to do for her like the way she liked to be bathed, what soap her skin suited, what dummy she liked, how she liked to sleep, when she was ready to move from her privilege Moses basket to her cot in her own room right down to what school she would suit today. All of these things were gut choices that essentially required me to trust my way in knowing what was right for my child.
6. I have so much more respect for my mother…
Now that I am a mom and I know how mentally, physically, emotionally and financially exhausting (and rewarding too of course), I have so much more respect for my own mother and if she were still alive today I would quite literally fall to her feet and thank her for all that she did for me to make me who I am today. Being a mom is no walk in the park but being a mom is a massive blessing and privilege I don’t take lightly.
What are some of the lessons you have learnt being a mom? I would love to hear your points in my latest Instagram post.
This blog post is sponsored by Baby Dove South Africa.
Until next time…
http://www.beingmaddiesmom.com | @being_maddies_mom
Photographs by Tanya Jacobs Photography